Autumn

As the weather gets cooler and the holidays get closer I am filled with mixed emotions. I love this time of year, the beauty of the leaves changing colors and being able to wear sweatshirts and jeans! There are so many fun times right around the corner with Halloween, Thanksgiving, black Friday, Christmas and New Years all within a few months! But with the changing of the leaves comes the reminder of the changes of myself and others with seasonal depression. The lack of sunlight, though I thoroughly enjoy the cold weather, brings out the worst in me. I get moody and never want to leave my couch let alone the house! It is ironic, and just my luck, that my favorite seasons, Fall and Winter, are tarnished with my attitude and unwillingness to leave my house! I hate taking medication and have not done so in years. Every year, I think I can do it myself if I just stay aware of it and motivate myself, and yet every year, I fail. Last year, I used a Happy Light, yes, that is it's actual name. It did seem to help, when I used it! The thing is that I wouldn't want to get off the couch to be around it, and if it was by the couch, it would be too bright for me to enjoy the TV. Even now, as I am writing this, I am trying to think of where I went wrong and how I can make it through without medication yet again......I am hopeless!